Friday, March 13, 2009
Hubert Davis: Bad Prediction
Georgetown is gonna be like a 2 or 3 seed in the fuckin' N.I.T. Good call Hubie!
For the record, Hubert Davis bugs the shit out of me. The guy is without a doubt, ESPN's most boring analyst. I've seen more emotion and facial expressions from the statue of liberty. He is so monotone it makes me cringe.
Did anyone catch that ridiculous 6 overtime Syracuse win last night? If you're a betting man (or woman, I'm fair) take West Virginia and lay the 6.5 points. Syracuse will be running on rubber legs and should be happy to score 50 points tonight. West Virgina is riding the high of that 14 point ass whoopin they threw on Pittsburgh last night. This game should be a cake walk.
Selection Sunday is 2 days away. Once we get all the teams and the seeding, I will be building several brackets and sharing with the BAMA nation. If you think you can beat me, I will give you a free t-shirt.
-Ollie
I Just Noticed This:
I know it really isn't a big deal, but did anyone else notice that we had back to back Friday the 13th's?
February 13, 2009:
March 13, 2009:
I hit up yahoo! answers to figure out how often this happens (consecutive months with the 13th falling on a Friday) and here is my favorite answer that some smart ass jerk off responded with:
"who cares....? im sure there's (back to back) wednesday the 21st's at some point too. whats the difference?"
HAHA. Now that's telling 'em.
Personally, I think it's kind of wild, but I'm not a superstitious dude so I'm not buggin' like some of these other folks.
For anyone who cares, this little phenomenon is set to occur again in 2015 (I think). In fact, it will happen EVERY TIME (save for leap years) the 13th of February falls on a Friday. Why? Well, there are 28 days in February (exactly 4 weeks) so every day/date in March will be the same as in February...
-Ollie
February 13, 2009:
March 13, 2009:
I hit up yahoo! answers to figure out how often this happens (consecutive months with the 13th falling on a Friday) and here is my favorite answer that some smart ass jerk off responded with:
"who cares....? im sure there's (back to back) wednesday the 21st's at some point too. whats the difference?"
HAHA. Now that's telling 'em.
Personally, I think it's kind of wild, but I'm not a superstitious dude so I'm not buggin' like some of these other folks.
For anyone who cares, this little phenomenon is set to occur again in 2015 (I think). In fact, it will happen EVERY TIME (save for leap years) the 13th of February falls on a Friday. Why? Well, there are 28 days in February (exactly 4 weeks) so every day/date in March will be the same as in February...
-Ollie
Thursday, March 12, 2009
I'm Sick
yo, checkin in but nothing to speak on cause I cant think with this midget's scissor lock vice grip on my head. a.k.a. this sinus infection.
See you tomorrow.
-Ollie
See you tomorrow.
-Ollie
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Cornhole: The Game That Is Sweeping The Nation
If you aren't familiar with the game of Cornhole, watch this brief tutorial to get caught up.
Now that we've gotten the instructions out of the way, onto the explanation of how great this game is.
Cornhole is the shit because:
Drinking is basically a requirement.
You can build the boards yourself with simple instructions from the internet.
It is relatively easy to play in comparison to other common backyard games. i.e. "washers" or "horseshoes".
The boards are completely mobile.
Your mom loves to play.
Join a league and get involved. If you are local (Central California) and are interested, holler at me. nickelplatedbama@gmail.com
-Ollie
Now that we've gotten the instructions out of the way, onto the explanation of how great this game is.
Cornhole is the shit because:
Drinking is basically a requirement.
You can build the boards yourself with simple instructions from the internet.
It is relatively easy to play in comparison to other common backyard games. i.e. "washers" or "horseshoes".
The boards are completely mobile.
Your mom loves to play.
Join a league and get involved. If you are local (Central California) and are interested, holler at me. nickelplatedbama@gmail.com
-Ollie
Angelina Jolie's Hotness Is All In Your Head:
Yeah I said it, now what you gon' do?
As I promised yesterday, I have every intention of debunking Angelina Jolie's hot factor. I am not one of those people who just accept things. The whole world has been brainwashed into believing that Ms. Jolie is the hottest chick on the planet. I just don't see it. I never really have.
I know what you're thinking, "Ollie, you're crazy dude, she's blazin hot", and I would expect nothing less from the male readers of this blog because you have been programmed to "believe the hype".
Let's get right down to the reasoning behind this blasphemous statement that Angelina Jolie is not hot.
Exhibit A: It's all surgically enhanced.
You see that shit? Back before the world ever knew who she was, she was like a 5 at best. But thanks to the help of plastic surgery (in more than one area) she has become this global sensation.
I've been on record on more than one occasion denouncing the use of plastic surgery to create a girl's hotness. It's cheating. I can't look at her the same after seeing that before and after photo. I really hope I've ruined her for you as well...
Exhibit B: Pale skin.
I don't know about ya'll, but vampires don't do it for me. This bitches skin tone is "kleenex". I can't get the image of her playing the role of "Gia" and being a fucking heroin junkie out of my mind. She just played the part a little too well if you ask me. I'm pretty sure she has been on methodone or some derivitive of heroin since that movie came out back in like '96, which would explain...
Exhibit C: She's too skinny.
YUCK!! I mean would you look at those chicken legs? You really trying to tell me that those stems are sexy? Really? You're out of your god damned mind. I couldn't find a good recent picture of her lanky ass arms but I assume they look something like those straight out of a comic book skeletor arms Madonna's old ass has been sportin as of late...
Plus her face is hella boney. About 8 years ago, I'll admit that Angelina's face was on point. But ever since she started practicing Kabalah or whatever the fuck religion is cool these days she is just lookin' haggard.
Exhibit D: Her tattoos suck.
I know everyone thinks her tattoos are dope because she had the witchdoctor from some South African tribe ink her up with a hammer and a wooden spear, but that shit don't impress me. In fact, all it does is make your tattoos look like shit and makes you look like even more of a dick. "Oh I had this done in the alps after a 3 day peyote binge"... FUCK OFF you dumb cunt. You still suck.
Exhibit E: Her movies suck.
Enough said.
Honorable mention: Wanted, Gone in 60 Seconds, Beowulf, Mr. and Mrs. Smith, etc. I could go on and on.
Exhibit F: Billy Bob Thornton.
Billy Bob Thornton put his dick inside of her. She wore a vile of his blood around her neck and had his name tattooed on her arm. If that doesn't tell you how far off the reservation this bird is, I don't know what will. Perhaps...
Exhibit G: She has 19 adopted children.
Ok maybe not, but she's damn near got a baseball team. She adopts them from all over the world too. I mean, she couldn't just focus on one region so as to keep a common element amongst the children?? Nope, I want one from Taiwan, one from Guatemala, one from Africa, one from Germany, and then I'm gonna cook up a couple of twins of my own just to show you little foreigners how little you mean to me. These kids are just accessories. I'm not even being cold hearted, it's flat out true.
Which brings me to my final piece of evidence,
Exhibit H: Her holier than thou attitude.
The above picture has nothing to do with this particular point, but it makes her look reeeeeaaaalllly bad, so I included it. This bitch thinks she's the business cause she adopted a few kids and parades them around for her own selfish needs. These children obviously have better lives now, but lets face it, she has to be the biggest pain in the ass ever. She's got more money than God, but dresses the kids in rags to show them that money isn't important while she stunts around town with her 30 million dollar blood diamond on her finger. Which incidentally is the only reason the African kid got adopted. She felt bad about her Sierra Leone diamond so she adopted the kid who mined it and figured it was even. Fucking cunt.
In all seriousness, Angelina Jolie is a fraud. From her looks right down to her faux humanitarianism. She's ugly on the inside and it bleeds right through her see through skin (cause it's so pale, get it?).
In her defense, her J's are on point and the lip game is fierce. See, I'm a fair dude, I give credit when it is due. But overall though, I am convinced that Angelina Jolie is a self serving bitch that has mind control powers. I mean, she made Brad Pitt wife it. That's fuckin Brad Pitt, the guy could literally have any woman on earth. It blows me away.
I'm done hatin for now.
-Ollie the Cold Hearted
As I promised yesterday, I have every intention of debunking Angelina Jolie's hot factor. I am not one of those people who just accept things. The whole world has been brainwashed into believing that Ms. Jolie is the hottest chick on the planet. I just don't see it. I never really have.
I know what you're thinking, "Ollie, you're crazy dude, she's blazin hot", and I would expect nothing less from the male readers of this blog because you have been programmed to "believe the hype".
Let's get right down to the reasoning behind this blasphemous statement that Angelina Jolie is not hot.
Exhibit A: It's all surgically enhanced.
You see that shit? Back before the world ever knew who she was, she was like a 5 at best. But thanks to the help of plastic surgery (in more than one area) she has become this global sensation.
I've been on record on more than one occasion denouncing the use of plastic surgery to create a girl's hotness. It's cheating. I can't look at her the same after seeing that before and after photo. I really hope I've ruined her for you as well...
Exhibit B: Pale skin.
I don't know about ya'll, but vampires don't do it for me. This bitches skin tone is "kleenex". I can't get the image of her playing the role of "Gia" and being a fucking heroin junkie out of my mind. She just played the part a little too well if you ask me. I'm pretty sure she has been on methodone or some derivitive of heroin since that movie came out back in like '96, which would explain...
Exhibit C: She's too skinny.
YUCK!! I mean would you look at those chicken legs? You really trying to tell me that those stems are sexy? Really? You're out of your god damned mind. I couldn't find a good recent picture of her lanky ass arms but I assume they look something like those straight out of a comic book skeletor arms Madonna's old ass has been sportin as of late...
Plus her face is hella boney. About 8 years ago, I'll admit that Angelina's face was on point. But ever since she started practicing Kabalah or whatever the fuck religion is cool these days she is just lookin' haggard.
Exhibit D: Her tattoos suck.
I know everyone thinks her tattoos are dope because she had the witchdoctor from some South African tribe ink her up with a hammer and a wooden spear, but that shit don't impress me. In fact, all it does is make your tattoos look like shit and makes you look like even more of a dick. "Oh I had this done in the alps after a 3 day peyote binge"... FUCK OFF you dumb cunt. You still suck.
Exhibit E: Her movies suck.
Enough said.
Honorable mention: Wanted, Gone in 60 Seconds, Beowulf, Mr. and Mrs. Smith, etc. I could go on and on.
Exhibit F: Billy Bob Thornton.
Billy Bob Thornton put his dick inside of her. She wore a vile of his blood around her neck and had his name tattooed on her arm. If that doesn't tell you how far off the reservation this bird is, I don't know what will. Perhaps...
Exhibit G: She has 19 adopted children.
Ok maybe not, but she's damn near got a baseball team. She adopts them from all over the world too. I mean, she couldn't just focus on one region so as to keep a common element amongst the children?? Nope, I want one from Taiwan, one from Guatemala, one from Africa, one from Germany, and then I'm gonna cook up a couple of twins of my own just to show you little foreigners how little you mean to me. These kids are just accessories. I'm not even being cold hearted, it's flat out true.
Which brings me to my final piece of evidence,
Exhibit H: Her holier than thou attitude.
The above picture has nothing to do with this particular point, but it makes her look reeeeeaaaalllly bad, so I included it. This bitch thinks she's the business cause she adopted a few kids and parades them around for her own selfish needs. These children obviously have better lives now, but lets face it, she has to be the biggest pain in the ass ever. She's got more money than God, but dresses the kids in rags to show them that money isn't important while she stunts around town with her 30 million dollar blood diamond on her finger. Which incidentally is the only reason the African kid got adopted. She felt bad about her Sierra Leone diamond so she adopted the kid who mined it and figured it was even. Fucking cunt.
In all seriousness, Angelina Jolie is a fraud. From her looks right down to her faux humanitarianism. She's ugly on the inside and it bleeds right through her see through skin (cause it's so pale, get it?).
In her defense, her J's are on point and the lip game is fierce. See, I'm a fair dude, I give credit when it is due. But overall though, I am convinced that Angelina Jolie is a self serving bitch that has mind control powers. I mean, she made Brad Pitt wife it. That's fuckin Brad Pitt, the guy could literally have any woman on earth. It blows me away.
I'm done hatin for now.
-Ollie the Cold Hearted
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