Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Final Four:

This will be my only post today as there really isn't anything of grand importance going on in the world.

I just wanted to ask a quick question...

Is it just me, or is the N.I.T. final four looking more interesting than the NCAA final four?

I mean seriously...

Catch me rootin hard for Michigan State and Villanova in the finals.

Sorry for the lack of updates today, I've been workin on gettin a bunch of other stuff done for the site.

NickelPlatedBama will soon be the proud owner of it's own personal domain, so the readers and fans will no longer be required to type in the .blogspot.com.

A new, improved interview with Makeshift will be up along with the "No Doze" mixtape available for free download exclusively on the BAMA.

I got alot of shit on my plate right now, but I'm keeping it under wraps for the time being.

I plan on going fishing in the morning, so if that happens, don't expect any updates unless I somehow manage to catch some fish.

I'm going to get shitty drunk right now for no good reason.

Enjoy your evening and fuck off.


Monday, March 30, 2009

Painting I Just Finished:


I started this thing like 3 months ago, finally got around to puttin' the finishing touches on it.

Specs: 32"x40" acrylic/opaque/gesso on masonite with 1"x3" frame



Pictures do no justice to the contrast of colors.

For real though, PLEASE tell me your honest opinions. Because personally, I am never satisfied with the stuff I paint, so you all have a chance to give an opinion that I will actually care about.

Let the praise/hate begin.


Album Cover Of The Day:


While cruising the local flea market a couple Subdays back I stumbled across this gem in a stack of mariachi and techno records.

As of yet, I haven't listened to it (my turntables currently reside at Young Smalls' house) but, in my mind, judging by the cover alone, this HAS to be a classic.

Seriously, have you seen a better play on words in photo form in your life? I think not.

It was a fairly uneventful weekend.

Posts will be short and limited this week. There are HUGE thangs poppin. Currently, I can't go into detail, but just know, power moves are in the works.

On top of that, there is a cornhole tournament this coming Sunday (April 5, 2009) and I gotta get into fightin' shape, I need the scratch after Oklahoma shit the fuckin bed and cost me the rent money.

People always ask me, "how can you handle the stress of gambling for your income?" My response is simple, ice water in the veins.


Friday, March 27, 2009

Weekly Recap:

Fmylife.com has taken over my life.

As much as I wanted Duke to win, Nova blew em out the building.

My bracket is toast after that ass tapping Memphis took last night at the hands of Missouri.

My drug habit has come to a grinding hault. Fuck this recession. LOL.

I'm hungover.

Makeshift is my favorite rapper.

Your mother thinks I'm handsome, and I don't blame her.

Updates tomorrow.


Thursday, March 26, 2009

Throwback Thursday: J-Zone - Bum Bitch Ballad

My man Zone, straight heater off the "Pimps Don't Pay Taxes" album from 2002.

"Wait a minute, you're talkin' 'bout my sister"... "50 cent juice drinkin BITCH!!"

I loves me some ign'ant behavior, and Zone defines that shit.


The Sweet Sixteen Begins Tonight:


As it stands right now (I'll just copy and paste becuase I don't have the slightest idea how to take screen shots):


1 The Bracketologist, K. Shaw 280 240 0 0 0 0 1240 520 93.7 UNC

- kaylankusserow 1, K. Kusserow 260 260 0 0 0 0 1240 520 93.7 Pittsburgh

3 Drama the Koofie Smacker, B. Lava 250 260 0 0 0 0 1240 510 88.9 UNC

- Boratotology, G. Martin 250 260 0 0 0 0 1200 510 88.9 UNC

5 OliverWrist 1, O. Wrist 250 240 0 0 0 0 1280 490 72.3 Memphis

- FYE-Knowledge 1, C. Brett 250 240 0 0 0 0 1160 490 72.3 UNC

- B.Blair, b. blair 230 260 0 0 0 0 1120 490 72.3 UNC

8 El Capitan , B. Brooks 240 240 0 0 0 0 1280 480 63.0 Memphis

- DJfalcon24 1, D. Justice 240 240 0 0 0 0 1240 480 63.0 Louisville

10 JonnyDurango, J. D 230 240 0 0 0 0 1280 470 53.2 Pittsburgh

- UvTBrock 2, B. Hardon 210 260 0 0 0 0 1280 470 53.2 UNC

12 Ricablanca 1, J. Ricablanca 220 240 0 0 0 0 1280 460 43.7 Pittsburgh

- Lake of UvTblog.com, L. Arlington 260 200 0 0 0 0 1120 460 43.7 Pittsburgh

14 Royal, S. Blair 220 220 0 0 0 0 1240 440 27.5 Duke

- EatMeCalifornia, B. Horan 240 200 0 0 0 0 1240 440 27.5 UNC

16 Bzaster , B. Harrell 210 200 0 0 0 0 1280 410 12.0 Pittsburgh

That probably looks like shit. But the basic run down is quite simple.

The little cousin Kris is knotted up with TBC for first place. I am in a 3-way tie for 5th in my own fuckin bracket challenge. The good homie Bennet is really shittin the bed and bringin up the rear. And Royal, well Royal is out his damn mind with that DUKE pick.

Big ups to the whole squad from code 2 ave for participating.

Brock and Lake from uvtblog.com.

Knowledge from ANATOMY BLOG.

Brian from eatmecalifornia.com.

The homie from way back, Jason, writer of Taco Life.

And one more final shout out to the homie B. Check his myspace page B the Heat Spitta.

P.S. DJFalcon24, not sure who you are but thanks for participating and shout me a holla if you read this!!

Tonight's picks: Duke over Nova and UConn over Purdue.


Twitter Quote Of The Day:

"I hope you tight jean wearin kats try to run some where and catch fire from the friction".

Courtesy of BigVon on Twitter.


Check the homie at BigVon.com Coming Soon.

On another note, I'm watching the PGA tour right now and some idiot in the gala (audience for you non golfing creightons) got his skull tattooed courtesy of a shanked tee shot from Retief Goosen. LOL.

Arnold Palmer's response: "tsst. Oh my goodness gracious".

I am still laughing out loud.

Other people's misfortune = My bread and butter.

OH YEAH can I just send a HUGE shout out to the homie Knowledge from ANATOMY BLOG. Dude is nice with the words and holding the BAMA down realllll firm. Big things to come with the Ollie/Knowledge Collabo.

Watch out.

***Update on dude who got smashed by the golf ball***

Huge fuckin lump on his temple. Retief Goosen shook his hand and walked away. Fuckin' icicle. LOL.

I'd be like "Thanks alot for fuckin up my shot jerk off".


Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Am I Seeing Things??

I have touched on my distaste for Lady Gaga on several occasions over the last several months on this blog. I mean, let's be honest, that music of her's is pure trash and this bitch has a schnauz like Gonzo from the fuckin' Muppet Babies...


Is there really any wonder why she is constantly covering that bad boy up with ridiculously large stunna shades?


HAHA. So you can imagine my surprize when I stumbled onto these joints (below) that revealed an AMAZING tail piece hiding behind that hideous face of hers... Oh you don't believe me do you?


I know what you're thinking, she's poking it out. There's no thickness there right? WRONG!


There couldn't possibly be a close up of that hook/arch game could there?


Are you seeing that hook? Good lawwdd!

Who knew that this broad:


Was packing this kind of heat?


Wow. Color me a believer.

It's a damn shame her face looks like a failed wire hanger abortion and she dresses like a short bus rider because that ass is thick.

Let's examine the J's to see if we have a complete package here (sans that face, cause Dr. 90210's entire staff workin' round the clock couldn't save this chick)...


Well, we won't get ahead of ourselves here.

I have to give ol' girl credit on that tail piece, but I think that's where it stops.

She needs several nose reductions, her eyes brought closer together, and a new stylist (cause that knock-off Bjork shit isn't gettin it done) before she gets official stamp of approval from your boy Ollie, but ladies of the world take heed, Gaga is bringin' some serious heat in the backyard so you better double up on your squats and thrusts.

Damn. I can't stop peepin these joints.


Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Ying Yang Twins Translated:

I caught this little gem over on Warming Glow and I gotta tell you, while it is a bit longer than the average video posted on here(running at a little over 7 minutes), it is worth every second.


Dude, So many things to point out.

1. The translation's are pure comedy. You can tell that Mr. Wonka (the translator if you didn't get to the end of the video) grows more and more annoyed throughout the video. I think it culminates around the 4:30 mark when he hits the viewers with this gem in reference to the "gator fur" on display...

"The Gator's thick white fur protects it in the winter". LOL.

2. "The Sea Room"? That shit blew me away. They have 3 fucking fish in that tank. 3!! How ghetto does that shit look with the cords just hangin all over the damn place? And how 'bout those paintings? They look like they were purchased from a street vendor in Long Beach on a 3 for $20 special.

3. How broke are these cats? Seriously? At the 3:40 mark, peep that extra official 26" t.v. and the Target "red light clearance" special ghetto blaster.

4. And the whips. Let's ask Lieutenant Worf how he feels about these scrapers...


Are these cats really pumped on the 2003, stepside, extended cab, canary yellow Chevy on Pep Boys' clearance blowout aluminum 19" rims? I know cats in high school that have harder whips.

5. How hard up were the producers of MTV for a celebrity crib to run in this episode? I mean shit, was Corbin Bernsen (of "Major League" fame) all booked up? I would have rather seen a cribs episode on Bill Bellamy...

6. This just goes to show how you can take the homie out the dirty ghetto, but you can't take the dirty ghetto out the homie...

7. Is it just me or does Kaine(?) have a striking resemblance to Mac Dre?



P.S. What ever happened to the Ying Yang Twins?

Crunk is dead. Thank you Hyphy movement. R.I.P. Mr. Furly.

-Ollie the hater

Monday, March 23, 2009

New Makeshift: The No Doze Mixtape




Seriously, is there any wonder why this cat is my favorite rapper doin' it right now? Straight killin' em.

The No Doze Mixtape will be available exclusively on nickelplatedbama sometime in the next few weeks for COMPLETELY FREE download.

I will say this now, and every day until the mixtape drops: DO NOT SLEEP!!!!

Makeshift is killin you fools.

Catch Makeshift Here
Catch Makeshift Here
Catch Makeshift Here


Cat's Need To Quit Frontin'...

Today's banger: Japcity - Identity Theft

"Gangsters don't have record contracts"...

nuff said.

For the record, the message far exceeds the quality of the music.


Interview With Larry Luk Co-Founder Of PROCESS Clothing

In the weeks leading up to my little excursion down to San Diego for the ASR and AGENDA trade shows, I reached out to several companies that were supposed to be attending the shows. One of the only other companies (besides the dbags from Cardboard Robot) that took the time to get back to me was PROCESS. More importantly, the man behind the line, Larry Luk. Larry informed me that the line wasn't quite ready for the January trade shows but kindly agreed to do an interview with me. After several weeks of e-mail correspondence we got it knocked out...

Here's the interview:


Oliver Wrist: For the people that didn’t catch the interview in Esper-Magazine, lets get the basics out of the way..

Your name, is it pronounced Larry Luck or Luke? My money is on Luke for the record…

Larry Luke: Yea, it's pronounced Luke... just without the "e"

OW: Age?

LL:28 years young.

OW: Company?

LL: Our design company is called Epidemik Coalition (EC). Our house brand and clothing line is called PROCESS. We're launching the line on 03.06.09 in some boutiques and online at wearetheprocess.com.

OW: Whose Involved?

LL: There are a lot of us involved with both EC and PROCESS. First of all, we're a group of graphic designers, web developers, photographers, musicians, DJ's and illustrators. We all contribute to each other's projects in different combinations all the time. We host events around Atlanta and we all come together for PROCESS.

OW: How did it start?

LL: PROCESS came naturally from our passion for design. We started printing our own graphic tees as we honed our design skills while in school. With each creative effort came a graphic tee. It was a good medium to experiment and learn on. As we made the decision to take the industry a little more seriously, it was time to rebrand from Epidemik Coalition to PROCESS.


OW: Where did it start?

LL: In the basement of a little graphic design school in Atlanta called Portfolio Center.

OW: Is this the only project you’re involved in?

LL: Not at all. Like I mentioned earlier, Epidemik Coalition is our creative agency. We do work for all types of clients that need design in their lives. The solutions and deliverables are all different, depending on the clients' needs. Designer and Production Manager for PROCESS are just a few of the hats I wear on a daily basis.

OW: How would you describe process?

LL: We're a group of graphic designers, photographers, branding experts, boutique owners, musicians, web-developers, and bloggers, that are all invested into this big idea at different levels. On top of that, everyone has their own main gig, and Process is an organic offspring of everyone's creative energies combined. I guess you could say that movers and shakers in Atlanta are down with the Process.

OW: Most people associate ATL with the “Dirty South Crunk” stigma rather than streetwear. Where would you say you developed your sense of boutique-oriented fashion?

LL: We're proud of the Dirty South reputation. We bring it as hard as we can with every effort. I think our line speaks to both the "exclusive products" oriented person as well as the creative/artist/designer person. Being boutique-goers ourselves, we quickly realized that there wasn't a brand from our area that we wanted to wear. So we decided to start one ourselves.


OW: As a company, you guys are staying rooted in ATL, how do you market yourself to the hipster scene of New York or the backpacking skinny jean crowd out in L.A.?

LL: We're proud of where we're from and we aren't looking to market ourselves specifically to anyone other than the folks that "get us". If you hate our part of the country, or if you have preconceived prejudices of Atlanta, then you probably won't want to rep PROCESS. With that being said, we wouldn't want you to either.



OW: To me it seems like there is literally a new “streetwear” company popping up daily, what separates PROCESS from the rest?

LL: I think the difference between PROCESS and many other brands it the fact that our designs and our line all come from a real place where concept and design play a major role in what we do. Our brand has a sense of aesthetic and ideals that we will not vary from. And lastly, we don't run down the street shouting ignorantly about our line.

OW: How do you feel about the term “streetwear”? (I’m not a fan).

LL: I'm not really sure where it came from and I don't care for it. But I will say that we're not trying to be a streetwear brand. Who knows, we might start making silk-scarves, eyeglasses, and perfumes some day. The sky is the limit. Who knows.

OW: Then who would you consider your target consumer?

LL: Like I said before, our target consumer is anyone that "gets us" from a creative standpoint. We're not looking to blanket the world ala Ed Hardy. We are simply putting ourselves out there as genuinely as possible. We feel that's the best way to get people on board with our brand.

OW: Tell us more about the “noncepts” phrase you coined in the esper interview…

LL: If there's no concept, it's a "noncept". Life's too short to waste your ideas on something half-baked. Design has consequences so your products need to have meaning. Take a look at 90% of the lines out there and you'll see their lack for concept. It's actually really lame to slap a photo of a sneaker on a shirt with a slogan that states your baller status. Weak sauce.

OW: The thing I like most about the Process brand is that it isn’t overtly hip hop in its roots, nor is it decidedly punk, or hipster, or scene, its just… well, I’ll let you put the word on it…


LL: It's all of that. If you came by our studio and looked at our mood boards, you'd see it all there. But it's all carefully translated into our version of that. Our crew grew up in different parts of the country and we converged on Atlanta and have made it our home base. We've got hip-hop heads, punk rockers, skaters, bikers, etc. We take our influences and distill them down to unique creative efforts. Hence, "WE are the PROCESS".

OW: Where do you want to see Process in the next 5 years? I mean, is it a line you want distributed at ZUMIES, or do you want to keep it more limited and “local” so to speak?

LL: We're taking everything one step at a time. First we need to set it off with our launch on March the 6th (03.06.09). (Editor's note, the line has since launched and it seems that things are going smoothly). After that, we'll see what happens. We're looking forward to expanding into stores by building solid relationships.

OW: That's about it as far as my questions go. So let me just say thanks for doin the interview Larry. Are they're any people you want to bless with a shout out? I mean, you know this blog is reaching world wide now (LOL)…

LL: Shouts to the rest of the PROCESS/EC crew, Georgios, Jorge & Jessica, Ted, Ross, & Erin. Farshad & Sandy with Standard. My family & my girl Lacey. Joe "Focus" Martinez, the next American Idol. Cory, Ryan & Tim with StreetLocal. Aaron Martell & The Joneses. Decatur Dan, The whole El Bar crew, Rob Wonder, Rosa, Colleen, Lord, Cristo, Slugger, Henry, Sumner, Zach Wolfe. Senor Kaos and thekaoseffect.com, Dosa, Prince Presto. Nikki Reid, "The Party Wolf". QC peeps, Josh, Myk, AC, Radar, and Bobby. Rehab family, Demun, Danny, Hano, Foz, Mike, Hood, Lamar, & Crisis. Farshid & Neda, Thoughtmarker blog (Mike Germon), Beep Beep Gallery (James), Mint Gallery (Erica), Sopo Bikes (Rachael), Gail Turner, Ryan James, John Henderson, Nick Cooper, Dr. Finck, Meesh, VS in MIA, King Screen (Dave & Scott), Octane, JDC, Armchair Media, Wade Thompson, Megan Huntz Dresses, the good folks at MODA, Dylan at Edmond, Iris, Kerri Boles, Criminal Records, the Local, Steven Dixey, and anyone else I forgot.


Bubba Sparxx reps the PROCESS, you should too!



Sunday, March 22, 2009

I Don't Work Weekends, But This Couldn't Wait:

Caught this shit on Bossip.com this morning...

The skinny jeans revolution is taking over today's urban youth. They have even created a new dance to go along with their awful fashion decisions. This ridiculous cross between the running man, jewish dippin, and an upright version of the worm is pure comedy... Peep the instructional video below...

Now that you've got the basics, watch these kids get wild at the local Burger King on (what I assume is) Fairfax in L.A.



Friday, March 20, 2009

Track Chad:

Meet my cousin/personal bodyguard Chad.


Chad is an on air radio personality for a locally broadcasted country music station.

The basic story goes like this:

February 1, 2009 Chad weighed in at 346 pounds.

He was challenged by the radio station to lose 60 pounds in 6 months. The station provided him with a personal trainer, nutritionist, gym membership, etc.

As of today, March 20, 2009 Chad has lost an amazing 29 pounds in a little more than 6 weeks.

I am very, VERY proud of my man for steppin up to the plate and making the commitment to get healthy and get right for the summer.

Go check his blog and show some support to my cousin for what he's tryin to do.

Track Chad Here

Big ups Chaddy. DO WORK SON!!


Thursday, March 19, 2009

Misery Loves Company:

The last 4 days of my life have been pretty brutal...

St. Paddy's was awful. I started throwin back beers at like 9 a.m. and ended up at Froggies around 11:00. We strong armed Becks for the better part of 5 hours and I decided to go eat at Long John Silvers. WORST.DECISION.EVER. 20 minutes later, CODE 2. If you aren't familiar, that's a sudden, unsettling need to shit. So i head home, handle my B.I. and then end up throwing up for the next 2 hours. Bedridden at 5:30 p.m. on the day of the drink. What a failure.

I have been sleeping on the couch (well, more like rolling around trying to find a few minutes of shut eye like a crack head) so as to not disturb TBC while she gets her beauty rest.

I have been sick, but more importantly, my Dr. refused to refill my "medication".

Just know this, everything I write on this blog is tamed down with xanax, you don't want to know me on a 3 day withdrawl.

I finally got into the Dr. yesterday, layed the smack down on his candy ass (yes that is a reference to Dwayne "the rock" Johnson), and got STOCKED THE FUCK UP.

I'm back in good shape so things are looking up.

I've been hittin the twitter HARD.

follow me: Ollie on Twitter.

Also, show some love to the folks in my blogroll...

Big ups to Lake and Brock over at uvtblog.com for showin some love and joining the NPB march madness challenge.

Big shouts to JonnyD, Royal, ElCapitan, and Drama from code2ave.

Big shouts to the new homie/twitter follower/fashion blogger Cliff from Anatomy blog.

New throwback Thursday joints will be up later. I'm locked into the ncaa tourney right now and Memphis is down 6 to fucking Northridge. Talk about a bracket buster.


Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Wild In The Streets:

Some wild ass Saudi's freeway skiing. These fools are gettin' loose.


Get In Today:

You people are slackin on joining the inaugural NickelPlatedBama ncaa march madness bracket buster challenge.

CLICK HERE to create your free ESPN account.

Once that is complete, type in the group name nickelplatedbama. It is a private group so it will ask for a password.

Group name: Nickelplatedbama

Password: bama4life

Winner gets a t-shirt.

The group closes tonight, so don't waste anymore time.

Get in on the fun.


Monday, March 16, 2009

So I Said Simple And Plain: Let's Battle.

Here's the scoop:

I challenge every reader of the blog as well as anyone else in the world who thinks they can beat my bracket.

The rules are simple.

Every person is allowed one entry into the group.

CLICK HERE to create an ESPN account.

After you've created you're account, you will want to "find group".

Group name: nickelplatedbama

password: bama4life

Enter your best bracket and ESPN does the rest of the work.

If you can beat me, I'll give you a t-shirt.

If you have any problems, holler at me in the comments section or on gmail. nickelplatedbama@gmail.com.

May the best man (or woman) win.



The Cleveland Show..

Am I late to this?

The Cleveland Show? I wish they would have done the Quagmire spinoff first, but I ain't mad at this. Family Guy is gettin a little redundant. The Cleveland Show is gonna be great...


Friday Night: Strippers, Craigslist Hookers, And More:

Last week you'll remember how all I could do was piss and moan about how sick I was and wah wah wah. For your information, it was all completely 100% true. I was layed up in my bad like a burn victim with a nasty sinus infection, and no matter how many vicodins I took, I couldn't shake the sickness.

Anyways, Friday afternoon, Smalls (my brother, a.k.a. D.J. Fuzzy Badfeet) shows up and says it's Kyle's birthday and we gotta find some strippers. I tell him I don't know if I can go because (at the time) I was only feeling about 60%.

I immediately changed my mind about not going when I thought outloud to myself "you're going to pass on an opportunity to slap some tits and humiliate some beezies?"..."Man the fuck up Ollie or you're credentials will be revoked.

Here's a pictorial of what transpired Friday night.


My uncle, a.k.a. "The Macho Man Dale Earnhardt Savage" stepped in the arena.


A bunch of young BAMA groupies slid through. I tried to hand them stickers and they all said "wait, you're the guy who writes that site?? We LOVE it..." So i gave them stickers and we had an impromptu photo shoot.





Oliver Wrist "The Loverboy Grunt" made his triumphant return to the wheels of steel and burned the house down with my set...


One of the BAMettes (the young groupies) asked if she could pose for a picture behind the turntables to "look like she was djing..." I said "FUCK NO, but I'll give you one free lesson..."



Giving instructions to drunk underage girls...


Sure was alot of Dicks in the joint...

The hoes arrived:


Due to my super official macking game, I got ol' girl to pose for a couple of joints before her bodyguard/pimp stepped to me and said "no more photos". I politely explained how big of a celebrity I am, and the fact that I cared enough to take their photos was a compliment and this was going to help her career...


The bouncer wanted to be down:


They're were 2 strippers. One was cool, prolly cause she was kind of a rookie and just wanted drugs. The other one was a straight seasoned vet. Turbo bitch. Was not havin any of the photo taking, so i went ahead and just filmed the whole fucking thing. Only problem now is finding a video hosting site that allows nudity, so for the time being, this is the only video that youtube let slide...

Trust in your boy, I got a solid 6 or 7 more minutes of quality stripper footage to post as soon as I find a host that isn't a porn site. Moving on...

My mom, my aunt, and my other aunt and uncle showed up to parlay with us during the strip off, CLASSIC.


Mom talking to Macho Man Dale Earnhardt Savage.



A few more photos of the stripper with the worst hips/ass/hips/ass game ever. I seriously can't explain it.


Overall, fun night. Homegirl that let me take her photos was worked in and had an awful grill, but she was cool. They both wore BAMA stickers the entire night. Found some new fans, and we rung in Kyle's birthday right. Happy birthday homie, thanks for having us, thanks for paying for the bitches, and thanks for the inspiration for a new post...

Stay tuned in the weeks to come, a new idea was born regarding craigslist booty calls, massage therapists, and "companions"...


Sunday, March 15, 2009

March Madness: Teaser

I hinted at it last week, but I just wanted to refresh everybody's taste buds.


Details coming Monday or Tuesday (tourney starts Thursday), so that will give you plenty of time to set up your brackets.

I will have a "private" group called "NickelPlatedBama" on espn bracket busters challenge. Everyone who wants to play will get anywhere from 1-3 brackets to fill out.

If you think you got what it takes, come get supper puppy.

-Oliver Wrist

Friday, March 13, 2009

Perfect Way To End Friday:


Stole it from the homie Sam from FTKconstruction.com.

Love to hate me.


It's Friday, Let's Have A Laugh

Horrible C-walk. Great yard sale (when all his shit goes flying). Whoever dubbed that track over the video picked an awful song. I want to punch that idiot. How fast was that treadmill going to shoot homie AGAINST THE WALL like that? I think it was on purpose, but nonetheless, awesome slam.

Hubert Davis: Bad Prediction

Georgetown is gonna be like a 2 or 3 seed in the fuckin' N.I.T. Good call Hubie!

For the record, Hubert Davis bugs the shit out of me. The guy is without a doubt, ESPN's most boring analyst. I've seen more emotion and facial expressions from the statue of liberty. He is so monotone it makes me cringe.

Did anyone catch that ridiculous 6 overtime Syracuse win last night? If you're a betting man (or woman, I'm fair) take West Virginia and lay the 6.5 points. Syracuse will be running on rubber legs and should be happy to score 50 points tonight. West Virgina is riding the high of that 14 point ass whoopin they threw on Pittsburgh last night. This game should be a cake walk.

Selection Sunday is 2 days away. Once we get all the teams and the seeding, I will be building several brackets and sharing with the BAMA nation. If you think you can beat me, I will give you a free t-shirt.


I Just Noticed This:

I know it really isn't a big deal, but did anyone else notice that we had back to back Friday the 13th's?

February 13, 2009:


March 13, 2009:


I hit up yahoo! answers to figure out how often this happens (consecutive months with the 13th falling on a Friday) and here is my favorite answer that some smart ass jerk off responded with:

"who cares....? im sure there's (back to back) wednesday the 21st's at some point too. whats the difference?"

HAHA. Now that's telling 'em.

Personally, I think it's kind of wild, but I'm not a superstitious dude so I'm not buggin' like some of these other folks.

For anyone who cares, this little phenomenon is set to occur again in 2015 (I think). In fact, it will happen EVERY TIME (save for leap years) the 13th of February falls on a Friday. Why? Well, there are 28 days in February (exactly 4 weeks) so every day/date in March will be the same as in February...


Thursday, March 12, 2009

I'm Sick

yo, checkin in but nothing to speak on cause I cant think with this midget's scissor lock vice grip on my head. a.k.a. this sinus infection.

See you tomorrow.


Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Cornhole: The Game That Is Sweeping The Nation

If you aren't familiar with the game of Cornhole, watch this brief tutorial to get caught up.

Now that we've gotten the instructions out of the way, onto the explanation of how great this game is.

Cornhole is the shit because:

Drinking is basically a requirement.

You can build the boards yourself with simple instructions from the internet.

It is relatively easy to play in comparison to other common backyard games. i.e. "washers" or "horseshoes".

The boards are completely mobile.

Your mom loves to play.

Join a league and get involved. If you are local (Central California) and are interested, holler at me. nickelplatedbama@gmail.com


Angelina Jolie's Hotness Is All In Your Head:

Yeah I said it, now what you gon' do?

As I promised yesterday, I have every intention of debunking Angelina Jolie's hot factor. I am not one of those people who just accept things. The whole world has been brainwashed into believing that Ms. Jolie is the hottest chick on the planet. I just don't see it. I never really have.

I know what you're thinking, "Ollie, you're crazy dude, she's blazin hot", and I would expect nothing less from the male readers of this blog because you have been programmed to "believe the hype".

Let's get right down to the reasoning behind this blasphemous statement that Angelina Jolie is not hot.

Exhibit A: It's all surgically enhanced.


You see that shit? Back before the world ever knew who she was, she was like a 5 at best. But thanks to the help of plastic surgery (in more than one area) she has become this global sensation.

I've been on record on more than one occasion denouncing the use of plastic surgery to create a girl's hotness. It's cheating. I can't look at her the same after seeing that before and after photo. I really hope I've ruined her for you as well...

Exhibit B: Pale skin.


I don't know about ya'll, but vampires don't do it for me. This bitches skin tone is "kleenex". I can't get the image of her playing the role of "Gia" and being a fucking heroin junkie out of my mind. She just played the part a little too well if you ask me. I'm pretty sure she has been on methodone or some derivitive of heroin since that movie came out back in like '96, which would explain...

Exhibit C: She's too skinny.


YUCK!! I mean would you look at those chicken legs? You really trying to tell me that those stems are sexy? Really? You're out of your god damned mind. I couldn't find a good recent picture of her lanky ass arms but I assume they look something like those straight out of a comic book skeletor arms Madonna's old ass has been sportin as of late...


Plus her face is hella boney. About 8 years ago, I'll admit that Angelina's face was on point. But ever since she started practicing Kabalah or whatever the fuck religion is cool these days she is just lookin' haggard.


Exhibit D: Her tattoos suck.


I know everyone thinks her tattoos are dope because she had the witchdoctor from some South African tribe ink her up with a hammer and a wooden spear, but that shit don't impress me. In fact, all it does is make your tattoos look like shit and makes you look like even more of a dick. "Oh I had this done in the alps after a 3 day peyote binge"... FUCK OFF you dumb cunt. You still suck.

Exhibit E: Her movies suck.


Enough said.

Honorable mention: Wanted, Gone in 60 Seconds, Beowulf, Mr. and Mrs. Smith, etc. I could go on and on.

Exhibit F: Billy Bob Thornton.


Billy Bob Thornton put his dick inside of her. She wore a vile of his blood around her neck and had his name tattooed on her arm. If that doesn't tell you how far off the reservation this bird is, I don't know what will. Perhaps...

Exhibit G: She has 19 adopted children.


Ok maybe not, but she's damn near got a baseball team. She adopts them from all over the world too. I mean, she couldn't just focus on one region so as to keep a common element amongst the children?? Nope, I want one from Taiwan, one from Guatemala, one from Africa, one from Germany, and then I'm gonna cook up a couple of twins of my own just to show you little foreigners how little you mean to me. These kids are just accessories. I'm not even being cold hearted, it's flat out true.

Which brings me to my final piece of evidence,

Exhibit H: Her holier than thou attitude.


The above picture has nothing to do with this particular point, but it makes her look reeeeeaaaalllly bad, so I included it. This bitch thinks she's the business cause she adopted a few kids and parades them around for her own selfish needs. These children obviously have better lives now, but lets face it, she has to be the biggest pain in the ass ever. She's got more money than God, but dresses the kids in rags to show them that money isn't important while she stunts around town with her 30 million dollar blood diamond on her finger. Which incidentally is the only reason the African kid got adopted. She felt bad about her Sierra Leone diamond so she adopted the kid who mined it and figured it was even. Fucking cunt.

In all seriousness, Angelina Jolie is a fraud. From her looks right down to her faux humanitarianism. She's ugly on the inside and it bleeds right through her see through skin (cause it's so pale, get it?).

In her defense, her J's are on point and the lip game is fierce. See, I'm a fair dude, I give credit when it is due. But overall though, I am convinced that Angelina Jolie is a self serving bitch that has mind control powers. I mean, she made Brad Pitt wife it. That's fuckin Brad Pitt, the guy could literally have any woman on earth. It blows me away.

I'm done hatin for now.

-Ollie the Cold Hearted