The burbs is goin' crazy...

But I still aint buyin' it.

This Asher Roth kid is supposed to be the next big thing in hip hop. BIG DEAL. Ive heard it before. He is literally saying nothing new. He jacks beats, spits witty "freestyles" and the internet starts goin ape shit. Look, just cause Em aint been heard from in like 5 years does not mean this kid is takin' over the thrown of "lyricist of the century" or whatever accolades the interwebs wanna give him. In all seriousness, this kid isn't even the nicest white rapper, don't try to put him in the category of "the illest".

I heard a rumor that he rapped for Jigga and Jay supposedly said "he's nice".

Who Cares?? I sure as fuck don't.

Dont get me wrong, the kid is definitely funny and I can understand the draw, hes a nerdy white kid with college mass appeal. He is the complete antithesis of 90% of records released in 2008 which is a huge breath of fresh air, but c'mon folks, this cat is not that good. He sounds like a hybrid between Eminem and Slug. Straight the fuck up. I'm sure I'm not the first to make this comparison, but FUCK IT, it is original thought. To be fair, I've posted a video of his "freestyle" over the famed Weezy "A Milli" joint that everyone and their brother ruined. Its solid. Its not as epic as the youtube/worldstar kids are makin it out to be though, thats for damn sho.



You want a good white rapper? You need to be fuckin with my man Copywrite. He is nothin nice. And while were at it, if nerdy white backpacker rap is your shit (it definitely isnt mine) why not run with a staple of underground culture for at least the last 8 years, my man Yakballz? Now these dudes are raw.

Which leads me to my next point, how can soft "beer pong" raps draw praise and admiration from the likes of Ludacris and DJ Drama?? I just cant get wit' it. Asher Roth is gonna have to do more than snap a couple witty punchlines to get my ears perked up.

While I'm on the subject of suburban rap, this cat Charles Hamilton is getting WAY too much praise for his music.



That sonic shit is ridiculously homo. He takes it serious though. He started to go to viral video war with Soulja Boy over that ish, no joke. More on Soulja Boy's place in this world in a different post. Back to business. Charles Hamilton is ok. He, like Asher Roth, is leading the new wave mainstream underground wave of suburban rap or better yet, rappers. That, in and of itself, is an oxy-moron, mainstream underground? Get the fuck outta here. I cannot buy into this. I know, I know, "He must be doing somethin' right if you're talkin about him Ollie" and to that I can't argue. He has the internet goin bananas cause he is, again like Asher Roth, a stray from the normal 2-step "do this dance" bubblegum bullshit that is floodin' radio airwaves year round. So, on that note, credit is given when credit is due. BUT, don't let that fool you. Charles Hamilton is just one of 923859685 rappers that are doing this, he just happened to peek some interest with that Sonic The Hedgehog obsession of his. For your consideration, I've attached the video to "Brooklyn Girls" by Charles Hamilton...



If thats your shit, then thats your shit and I aint mad at you. My only reason for posting this is to let the masses know that it is, in fact, OK to not believe the HYPEBEAST. I know what I like folks and this isn't it. Its no wonder I havent bought a rap album in like 3 years. If this is the future of hip hop, I'm gonna start the movement of Hank Williams Jr. remixed with a vocoder and techno drums while still maintaining the classic guitar twang he is so well known for. Don't bite, that just might make a million for your boy.

-Oliver the dictator